In this post, which is not a post proper, two things are going to become dreadfully clear to you, dear reader. First, you will learn that Twitter and I? We are not good friends. It’s not that I have a problem with Twitter – we just don’t understand each other. I was going to link to a post on Tits and Sass where a writer says she pities people who don’t get Twitter, but then I remembered that it was this piece, which is horribly disableist, and I don’t want to open that can of worms right now (hint – if you want an A+ example of the way disability is often cast as a punishment, click that link – dare ya).
The other thing that will become clear to you is that I have a lady crush on Sady Doyle. Sometimes, it’s an unpopular opinion. Sometimes, I get mad at Sady, too. But sometimes – okay, most of the time – she tickles me fucking pink. Today, I am positively rosy.
Over the weekend, says Sady, there was a trending topic on Twitter (if you’re Twitter-pated – HA! – like I am, trending topics have to do with hashtags, which are those things that start with the pound symbol, which is this: #) that was all HAHA about violence towards women. I don’t know – maybe I’ve grown too “politically correct” (I’m totally air-quoting right now) in my old age, but this trend toward ironic offensiveness doesn’t really tickle my funny bone. Like, ooh, it’s so edgy to spew hateful, racist, sexist shit – we don’t actually mean it or anything! Come on! What, do you have sand in your vagina? Get that sand out of your vagina, lady! Drink some milk* to manage that PMS, for fuck’s sake, amirite????
So this trending topic happened, and I was oblivious to it, because Twitter for me is more of a chore than a fun exercise in internet funness, so I’ll trust Sady with it, especially given her smashing work on #mooreandme. And also because she makes me laugh. Case in point:
Ladies! Are you single? Don’t be silly, of course you are. Why else are you reading the Internet, and not lying in a field of wildflowers, gently running your fingers through your man’s hair? (Yes, he would be a man. Yes, he would be, SHUT UP.) Well, ladies, before the loneliness consumes your very entrails and leaves you a bitter shell (a gradual, medically documented process that I must warn you has probably already set in, what with you reading the feminist blogs and all) I would like to extend a helping hand to you. For, you see, I have read on numerous occasions, in numerous publications for the womenfolk, that people are actually meeting their sex partners and/or reasons to live… on the very Internet itself!
Oh, Sady Doyle. You are an amazing lady.
Basically, what happened is that a bunch of dudes got on Twitter, and thought it was fucking HILARIOUS to tweet “good” reasons to beat your girlfriend.
And because Sady is so often my hero, she gives us a rundown of what happened by framing it as a dating service for lonely ladies reading feminism on the internet.
This was an awfully long post for what I was really trying to accomplish – I really just want you to go read Sady’s piece.
*I was going to link you to the Everything I Do Is Wrong campaign, but the folks over at Got Milk? realized that they fucked up, and now are trying to facilitate discussions about why they’re misogynists or some shit. They’re calling this campaign, “Got Discussion?” which is just lazy, in my opinion.